Small Business | Forum « Product Descriptions: Looking for Ideas

Product Descriptions: Looking for Ideas (7 posts)

Lukas Pleva said
1 year ago:
Hi folks,
I am in need of some creative assistance.
Here’s the background:
I own and operate a mail order bagel website, http://www.new-york-bagels-shipped.com. The idea’s pretty simple; if you are craving an authentic NY-style bagel but don’t have a decent bakery nearby, you can use our website to order bagels by postal mail. We ship via USPS Priority Mail or Express Mail, and vacuum seal the packages to prevent the occurrence of mold.
I was wondering if y’all might have some ideas on how to write longer and more substantive product descriptions. Right now, all we have for each bagel is:
“Our delicious, authentic New York style [name of bagel ]“.
I was thinking maybe add the ingredients for each bagel, but would love additional thoughts.
Thank you in advance!
- Lukas
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Ed Gaile said
1 year ago:
Yes I would expand on the descriptions if you can. Maybe have multiple photos (i.e. one with it split open and another with a shmear on it). You want to invoke some emotion with the users whether through the description or visual.
Do you have any customer testimonials you can add to the description area? If I am looking at a mail order bagel co. I want to know others have had a good experience and the product is awesome.
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Renee St. Peter said
1 year ago:
Lukas, what about creating a story around the origins of each flavor, especially the more “eclectic” varieties, for example:
Sam, an artist, loved the color contrast of x and y, and asked us to create a bagel that looked as good as it tasted.
-or-
What do you do when you have a bunch of x and a little bit of y left over from a previous batch? You create this delicious and unique flavor combination!
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Joan Muschamp (Fagnani) said
1 year ago:
@lukaspleva You need to describe the experience of eating a New York bagel…the wonderful smell, the sights and sounds of the neighborhood, the shop owner telling you what to put on it…inflection the accent of the Borough. Consider naming different flavors after some iconic part of the city. Include recipe suggestions that go beyond Lox & bagels.Consider having videos of real New Yorkers describing their favorites.You can have fun and get to the taste buds and emotions of site visitors…as I was writing this, I can vividly remember being a child and coming into our kitchen and smelling the spaghetti dinner cooking. My “memory” is so vivid I think it is always ia cold, rainy or snowy Saturday. That to me is what you wNt to do…transport the person to another place, full of aroma and flavorIf you need ingredients for health reasons, either romanticize them (if you can) or relegate them to fine print. When I say romanticize, I mean things like ” the finest hand-milled organic flour loving grown by” type of stuff. This assumes you do not have to meet specific legal requirements.Just my thoughts
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Dea Irby said
1 year ago:
Looks like you are getting some awesome ideas, Lukas. Joan, I like the way you think! @joanmuschampfagnani @lukaspleva @reneestpeter @egaile
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Joan Muschamp (Fagnani) said
1 year ago:
@deairby just saw all the typos–yikes, I hate rushing on the iPad. I never catch them as well as on the keyboard.
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Rich Brooks said
1 year ago:
@lukaspleva
The problem is, people may not realize that NY bagels are superior. (Although I grew up in Boston, I must admit–grudgingly–that they are.)
I think you have to educate people as to why they’re better. (The water.)
Maybe you could equate them to NY pizza. Almost everyone (except those crazy Chicagoans) believe NY pizza is the best, so by associating NY bagels to NY pizza, you can create a connection people will respond to.
Now, do you also ship lox?
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