Although this just happened on Facebook, I’ll start the conversation in this club because it could happen anywhere.

I posted a thread on FB about what candy from your childhood you hadn’t outgrown. It was just a silly little question, but it got a lot of feedback. 

(Mine’s Sprees, in case you were wondering.)

After about 30 comments an uncle of mine who grew up in another time said what could only be taken as a racist comment on a nickname of a popular candy.

I deleted it, as my personal profile is closely linked with my brand, but meanwhile most of the people who commented got an email with his comment.

Outside of immediately deleting his comment and sending him a message that what he said wasn’t acceptable, is there anything else I should do? How would you handle it?

(BTW, I don’t believe my uncle is racist, nor has he ever behaved in a racist way in front of me. He just said something that is completely unacceptable today, and to me.)

@rich-brooks  I think what you did should be enough.  Most people know you cannot prevent “unacceptable” posts.  But you deleted it immediately, so that shows your objection to it, and those that got the email will see that you did so.

@rich-brooks Playing Devil’s advocate, could it have been a teaching moment? Responding with a ‘wow times have changed and I can’t believe that we ever thought that way’ (personally I would take the deletion route too). 

I think people understand that Facebook is more or less an open platform. You can’t control what people post. I wouldn’t stress about it. 

Hello Rich @rich-brooks 

My FB personal account is also linked to my brand so I don’t really chit chat all that much with relatives, although sometimes it happens.  A cousin just had a new baby grand-sugar and of course, that’s a very big deal to all of us.  Adorable child. At any rate, interacting with family is a big part of FB, so, unavoidable.  

FB is different than a lot of other places, you pretty much have complete control over what happens and how you handle that will reflect on your biz acumen.  I know; I’m in the same boat. 

If a relative is being unkind, cut them loose. I mean that.  For whatever reason, this relative has chosen to deface your wall.  What would you do if this was a stranger?  You’d boot them out, right now, without question, right?  No difference for a relative. IF they know this could impact your biz, then that person does not have your best interest at heart. 

Or, at the very least, send a private message that tells him what he did (the comment) and why it was removed. I don’t think I’d send anything that goes out to everyone.  Since this fellow is family you have to take a slightly different tack. The fact that the comment was racist does matter however, you see this in the mainstream every single day.  Some racist jerk spouting their poison.

And if you don’t hear from him, just mark it up to a sad/bad experience and move on. You know, you cannot please everyone.  It’s impossible.  We’d all like to please every single person; but OH!pinions are like… well, you know (and everyone has one.)

This was mine.

.02 – Eileen  

@judithgotwald you make a valid point, but I would be discriminating about what I let slide by. If you know your audience then you will have a better understanding of how they might perceive it, not how it was intended to be perceived.

Negativity attracts negativity, just like positive attracts more positive. As the leader, which if it’s your page you’re the leader, you are responsible for setting the tone and deciding what is acceptable and unacceptable.

Hello all – as a relatively new FB user I have a couple of questions relating to the above posts

1) is there a way to limit your relatives friends from posting in your News feed until you have approved it?

2) Can this be done on a person by person basis, or do you have to do it through creating a list?

3) I agree that deleting negative comments is a great approach, and sensitivity about tolerance and learning from different generations, but I would like to know what steps each of you take to protect yourselves, or monitor these types of comments on a daily basis.

Thanks

I know. @juleswebb

@iamconsulting – Yep – that’s the thing to do. Agreed.  :D

@rich-brooks as you know negatives comments are a great way of turning a negative into a positive situation. Thereby saving face, showing that you are responsible and that you care.

But every now and then you will get someone saying something completely irrelevant , irresponsible and insensitive.  In this case the delete button is more appropriate. Besides leaving such a negative comment that will only cause more trouble out there associated to your profile can do more harm than good.

Guilty by association.  

Funny! We work so hard to get comments. Then we struggle with what to do with them!

I think this illustrates perfectly why I have a Facebook account that is strictly used for business and one that is for friends and family. I think that there needs to be that separation in pages. Alternativly I think that your situation could have been better handled by simply responding to the comment in a positive way. “Uncle, times have changed and that is no longer an acceptable nickname” would have showed that you didn’t like the comment- thus placing you in a more positive light. All too often, we become “delete happy” as it is the easiest way to deal with things quickly.